Burden or Bearing Wall
- Advoco
- Aug 6, 2021
- 2 min read
I’m reading a true crime novel by Ann Rule called Everything She Ever Wanted. The book is about a narcissist and how she destroys pretty much every relationship she has, including with family, friends, and employers.
There was a quote in the book that really struck me. The quote was referring to family dynamics:
Every family maintains a balancing act; some members need more attention, more affirmation. Others are independent or just plain loners. Usually, individual needs change frequently and different family members become the current “burden” to be kept aloft until the balance shifts once again. In a functional family, problems eventually work out and everyone takes a turn at being the bearing wall or the burden.
As I read this excerpt, I realized this applies to more than just our families. It also applies to our teams too.
We all have a role on the team, and we all play that role. Sometimes we are the burden, needing a little extra help, and sometimes we are the bearing wall, helping to uphold our other teammates. To be a highly functioning team we need to recognize that each situation may lead to a new role for our various team members. No one should always be the burden, and no one should always be the bearing wall.
We should "take turns" and accept support when needed or give support when needed. Being the bearing wall or the burden changes with each project or assignment. It is important to recognize and do your best in either role. It’s equally important to understand that at some points your teammates need you to be and do different things.
A team becomes dysfunctional when one person is always the bearing wall and another always the burden. This can have disastrous impacts including team friction and burnout. If you have a team member who is always the burden, needing to be kept afloat, maybe it’s time to reassess the team. We need to move those people who can’t serve the role when it is needed.
Work, like life, is fluid. So be prepared to be both the burden and the bearing wall, and extend the grace to your team to do the same.
Until next time…we are Advoco, make every minute count.
About Michelle: It’s hard to find someone that doesn’t like Michelle – she’s easy to talk to, she’s a wealth of knowledge about EAM, she’s relatable, and to top it all off, she’s fun to be around! Her Infor EAM life started at a university that used the product to manage facilities. She has since built up and manages our Post Implementation Consulting team. When Michelle isn’t helping our customers, you can find her in her garden preparing vegetables for canning or touring the Upstate on her motorcycle! Have a question for Michelle? Send her an email!
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